Meet Very kind Layer

One afternoon a lawyer (probably a barrister) was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.

He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass."

"Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you," the lawyer said.

"But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree."

"Bring them along," the lawyer replied. Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You come with us, too."

The second man, in a pitiful voice, then said, "But sir, I also have a wife and SIX children with me!"

"Bring them all, as well," the lawyer answered.

They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine was.

Once under way, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."

The lawyer replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place. The grass is almost a foot high."

Judge can't judge a lawyer

A young lawyer was defending a wealthy businessman in a complicated lawsuit.

Unfortunately, the evidence was against his client, and he feared the worst.

So the lawyer asked the senior partner of the law firm if it would be appropriate to send the judge a box of Havana cigars.

The partner was horrified. "The judge is an honorable man," the partner exclaimed.

"If you do that, I can guarantee you will lose the case!"

Weeks later the judge ruled in favor of the lawyer's client.

The partner took him to lunch to congratulate him. "Aren't you glad you didn't send those cigars to the judge?"

The partner asked. “But I did send them,"

Replied the lawyer. "I just enclosed the complainant's lawyer's business card!”

Would you like to play a fun game.....?

An auditor & a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from KL to KK.

The lawyer asks if the Auditor would like to play a fun game?

The Auditor, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.

The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vice versa."

Again, he declines and tries to get some sleep.

The lawyer, now agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay
me $5.00, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500.00."

This catches the Auditor's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless he plays, agrees to the game. The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"

The Auditor doesn't say a word, reaches into his purse, pulls out a $5.00
bill and hands it to the lawyer.

"Okay", says the lawyer, "your turn." He asks the lawyer,

"What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?"

The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the library, no answer.

Frustrated, he sends Emails to all his friends and co-workers, to no avail.

After an hour, he wakes the Auditor, and hands $500.00. The Auditor says, "Thank you," and turns back to get some more sleep. The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the Auditor and asks, "Well, what's the answer?"

Without a word, the Auditor reaches into his purse, hands the lawyer $5.00,
and goes back to sleep.